Wednesday, 28 September 2016

Is the grass greener on the other side?



I've had enough of *insert country here*! The weather is shit, the government is incompetent, there are no jobs, the rents are too high, I can't afford a mortgage, childcare is too expensive, education is getting worse, I hate the mentality, I pay too much taxes, I can't afford healthcare... The list goes on and on.

If you read this and you're French, you might think I'm talking about France. If you're Irish, you'll probably think I'm talking about Ireland.

You know what? No country is perfect! And most of the time, you only realise how lucky you were once you go abroad and discover how things are done somewhere else.

But if you are in a negative state of mind before moving, the chances are every little set back in your new country will irritate you and you might find yourself reacting like many expats I came across: "In my country, we do it this way. It's a lot better." or "I was told I could come to Ireland and find a job in two days without speaking a word of English". Newsflash: You'll never find a job in 2 days without at least being able to have an interview in the native language. Unless you're incredibly lucky (which could happen too, you never know).

My point is, if you think that moving to another country is the solution to all your problems, you're making a big mistake. And if you think that everything will be easy and better in your new country, it's time to wake up and smell the coffee!

Living abroad is going to be different. Sometimes it will be harder than at home, sometimes it will be easier. But you will need to embrace a new culture and way of life. Yes, some things will be worse than in your native country but other things will be better too.

In France, childcare is affordable, food is not expensive, there is a lot more social protection, and more holidays. In Ireland, finding a job is easier once you speak the language. Recruiters hesitate less about hiring someone with little experience, once the motivation is there.  People are relaxed (sometimes too much and it can become frustrating) and generally friendly. There is less social welfare than in France, but believe it or not, Irish people think there is too much of it! (They obviously never lived in France!).

In short, there is good and bad about every country and how you fit in depends a lot on the individual. I love Ireland but not everybody does, for different reasons. Some countries would be crowded if we all loved the same places!!

I think the key to happiness is to appreciate what we have and come to the fact that, no, the grass is not always greener on the other side, it just has a different shade.

Comments (25)

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This is all so true!
1 reply · active 441 weeks ago
Interesting post, but I have to disagree on one point.

In France, child care is not affordable as you pay most of it through insane taxes. Added to fees that can be quite high, overall amount is very expensive.
Unless you don't pay income taxes and take advantage of very low fees ? But in that case, that means others people have to pay for your child care. It remains very expensive, but you just don't care.
8 replies · active 440 weeks ago
Thanks for your comment :-) Regarding childcare, I only based this on what my friends in France told me. As far as I know they were getting tax credit for childcare so basically, at the end of the month, a childminder would cost them something ridiculous like €2.50 per hour! Add to the fact that in France you need a creche or a childminder only until they go to school at 3, and then they can avail (hopefully everywhere) of before school and afterschool care. In Ireland they only go to school at 5 years old and only until 1:40pm or 2:40, so you need childcare after school as well.
At the end of the day, childcare is expensive everywhere, and that's something parents have to take into consideration when they decide to have kids or move to a different country ;-)
"a child minder would cost €2.50 per hour! " : Wonderful ! With social charges paid by this child minder, that means she accepts to work for €2/hour net pay ! Unless she actually works for around €10/hour ? But in that case, who pays the missing €7.50/hour ?

What a mystery... Ask your friends and let me know. I look forward to it...
I think you misinterpreted what I meant. All I was saying was that, they could get tax credit for their childcare, which, in the end, meant that they were paying a lot less ( https://www.service-public.fr/particuliers/vosdro... So, who pays the missing €7.50? The French government I suppose ;-). In Ireland, there is no such thing as tax credit for childcare, you only get child benefit ( 140 euros/month for each child), but a creche full time could cost up to 900 euros/month for one child!
Bingo, the missing €7.50 are paid by the government ! And guess where does the government get these €7.50 from ? French people pockets, of course. So, are you still sure that French people pay less than Irish people for their child care at the end of the day ?
For your information : http://www.wikiberal.org/wiki/There_Is_No_Free_Lu...

And don't thank me, this web link is free ;-)
Look, I get your point, the money comes from other people's pocket, but that's kind of the point of taxes. The more you pay, the more subsidised services you get...
"The more you pay, the more subsidised services you get" : Although it is totally unproven, let's assume it is right. I
n that case, please don't tell us that child care is cheaper in France than Ireland. That was my point and I hope I opened -at least a little bit - your eyes.

But congrats for your blog, by the way. As a French guy who has been living in Ireland for 4 years, I find it very good.
OK, let's stop arguing :-) I'm sure we would have a great debate about this subject but it would be far easier to talk than write, so we will leave it like that. I can admit when I'm wrong but in this case I haven't done enough reasearch to completely prove my point either, so I'd better stop now before I dig the hole deeper ;-)
Anyway, thanks for the compliments about my blog :-) It's always nice to see someone appreciative.
I agree I think there are good and bad things about every country and you can't blame the country for all your problems! (tempting though it might be at times!). I read that when people are going through culture shock and getting used to a new place they can be overly critical, it's like a new relationship once you are out of the honeymoon phase and you suddenly notice all the person's flaws!
My recent post September recap
1 reply · active 440 weeks ago
You're right, like everyone else, I tend to criticise easily, but what I've learned by living in Ireland is to put things into perspective. We all moan from time to time, but life goes on and we have to make the best of it, wherever we are ;-)
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nice post
Grass seems green
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Very nice posts.
I like the last sentence of the article, you have come to a very valid conclusion. Really not everyone realizes this "No country is perfect! And most of the time, you only realise how lucky you were once you go abroad and discover how things are done somewhere else.". Happiness comes from the mind, when you think positively, you will see the light of positivity everywhere and vice versa.

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